Every Choice Creates or Destroys a Legacy (Read Time: 3 min.)

The older I get, the more I realize how powerful choice is.  In this life, there are no MAJOR life decisions.  ALL decisions (big or small) have MAJOR life implications... and that's where we miss the boat.  The defining moments of our lives rarely look the way we expect them to.  They are quiet, subtle, seemingly small choices and we fail to realize their gravity until years have passed and we look back to find that in that one moment, we decided much more than a decision; we created a legacy.

Knowing that now, I make decisions with two things in mind: 1) integrity and 2) legacy.  Before making any decision, I ask myself: 1) How does this decision reflect my character? and 2) What legacy will the consequences of this decision leave for my children's children's children?  You see, it's not about us.  At the end of the day, each person is a vehicle through which destiny travels... and not just your destiny but the future and the calling of your children to come.

Before you make a choice, before you pick a path, and before you go down a road, ask yourself two very important questions:

1) Can I live with the consequences of this choice for the next 50 years?
2) Am I willing to create the legacy of this choice for my children's children's children and is this the legacy that they deserve?

In any given moment, you have the right and the responsibility to choose wisely.  Be sure that you decisions are made based on the future you plan to leave for your eighth generation. 

I Need a Nap (Read Time: 3 min.)

Sleep deprivation puts me in a weird place and I'm in a weird place today.  I feel like the world is on my shoulders, like I've got so much to do in so little time, and I feel the bigness of all of it.  Staying present has been difficult today and guess what?  I have days like this.

As I work to get present and centered, I find myself observing life.  Whether I'm looking for clues, answers, or signs, I'm noticing things today and getting bothered by stuff today that wouldn't normally catch my attention.  That's the signal to me that I need to rest, rejuvenate and get back to me.    It all boils down to one word: stressed.

So many things aren't going according to plan that I'm almost to the point of throwing out the whole damn plan.  Ever watch something unfold not knowing how exactly it's going to end?  That's how I feel about life in this moment.

I know it's all good.  I know things work out but I'm looking at each day and wondering, "What is the meaning of this?"  When you're young, you watch all these movies that feature these "defining" moments, moments where the protagonist wakes up to life, goes "AHA!" and arrives.  At 16, I thought that "arrival" would happen at 25.  At 34, I realize that there is no arriving.  Here is what is and the present is where the future is created.  It's all about the now baby... and the futuristic part of me simply isn't having that. 

But, rather than fight life, I've decided to join with it.  I say to myself, "Be here now."  I remind myself, at times, to not worry about what can't be controlled or changed.  I work hard to center myself through meditation and prayer. 

Life is changing and it's all good.  I'm still learning how to be good with any changes.  But there's a part or me that rebels against it.  In the words of Ebenezer Scrooge, that part is looking at life right now and is saying "Ba humbug!" 

My dreams are coming true and I'm scared SH*TLESS! (Read time: 3 min.)

This week has felt tough.  Not hard work, blood, sweat and tears tough but mentally challenging, limiting beliefs driven, fear in your face emotional battling.  I'm in the midst of major changes where I'm starting to see that my dreams (those long sought after things I've said I've wanted for years) are finally starting to come true... and I'm scared shitless.

When I created those dreams, I was excited at the hope of them.  When I held onto those dreams, I was passionate about the promise of them.  Now that the dreams are actually starting to realize, I'm scared at the thought of both having and possibly losing them.  And here's what I've had to say to myself to move through it: Think challenges, not problems... and you LOVE to thrive through challenges.  

The way you look at a situation decides how you move through a situation.

And here's what I wanted to blog about.  People will tell you about dreams fulfilled.  They'll preach to you about what it took to achieve them.  They'll motivate you with what they had to do to stay the course but who talks about the sheer fright, resistance, and pain that comes when it suddenly dawns on you what you've struggled so long and hard for is finally coming true and it's now up to you to make good on it?  Who's going to talk to you about the fact that having a dream realized also means that you've hit the point of no return, the point where you can no longer be who you used to be and you're heading into a territory of being someone you've never physically met before?  It's like going on a blind date... with your best self. 

And as I embark upon this next journey of stepping into a new level of personal power, I feel three things:
1) The tug of who I used to be
2) The deceiving comfort of who I currently am
3) The thrill and fright of who I'm slowly but surely becoming

And it doesn't feel like joy every single day of the week.  Today it feels like being almost pregnant- think EPT, two lines but one line isn't really there -and I've decided to take that feeling and transform it into joy.  Why?  Because the alternative is not very fun and won't go a long way in making me feel any better.

What's my point in all this?  Scared shitless is not a sign to stop; it's a symbol of you moving forward.  Feel the fear and do it anyway!